Mighty Musical Monday: Perfect

Okay, so this is where my 12 year old girl circa 2010 starts showing her true colors. I freaking love boy bands. No shame about it. I know there should be shame but there is not. I especially love me some 1D. I, especially, love this one. 

It's not a love song. It's about having fun and doing what feels right in the moment. I, personally, love midnight driving with the windows down AND going places I can't even pronounce. Generally, if you see me running and I'm singing out loud, it's because this song is on. 

Somehow, it's on my current playlist twice. I think that was probably Sub-conscience Jackie looking out for Eunner Jackie. Either way, I'm not mad at it. Enjoy!

Thursdays Suck

Thursdays SUCK. They just do. You might not know it yet or realize it, but now that I've brought it to your attention, you'll see. I'll make a believer out of you. There's very little awesome happening on Thursday. 

Even Throwback Thursday encourages living in the past rather than facing the awful that is Thursday. It's inexplicable. It just sucks. 

To combat the uber suck, I'll share a motivational quote, meme or whatever every Thursday. If all else fails, remember that tomorrow is Friday and.... that's neat. 

I felt this was a great way to kick it off, as it speaks to my soul. It's not always easy to light a fire under your own ass. I've found, generally, it's because I'm afraid of failure. There's a real chance I might not accomplish 1,000 miles this year because who knows what the rest of the year holds. 

The year is 4% over and I've accomplished 3% of my goal. I'm already behind, what a great excuse to leave it all behind. But no, my soul is burning with this challenge - because it's about more than the physical accomplishment - and I will be fearless in the face of it.  

Will you?

 

Goal: 1,000 miles

YTD:  31 miles

Miles To Go: 969

Mighty Musical Monday: Panic!

I have this friend who has this theory that you should start every day with a song. Kind of like the opening credits to a movie. Generally, upbeat and having some relevance to the plot, the opening song sets the tone for the whole thing. As grown humans, I promise you will hate nearly every song I select for my opening credits each week. My musical taste ranges from 12 year old girl circa 1998 to 12 year old girl circa 2016. Throw in some college dorm room indie rock here and there and you basically have every half marathon playlist I've ever made (excluding that year I listened to Hunger Games on audio). Regardless, I will share because this blog is about me not you, ya see. Just kidding! In fact, please share your pump up songs and playlists. Tell me what I should be listening to and maybe your song will be featured as the following week's "POWER SONG!"

This week's song, I just can't get out of my head. Firstly, I'm not always totally sure what he's saying, so there's a little mystery there and I get to try to solve it each time Shuffle blares it in my ears. Also, the lyrics I can understand are pretty poignant. Sometimes, I'm motivated by haters (don't roll your eyes, you are too!): the people that didn't believe in me, the people that rejected me, the people that
have abused me. There's one in particular that this song makes me think of and as it crescendos, I get this feeling of righteous empowerment. That giant middle finger lights a little fire under my feet and I can pretty much conquer anything (think football fields worth of hills in the blistering cold).

Without further adieu, the first installment of MIGHTY MUSICAL MONDAY (MONDAY.... MONDAY...)

To Begin With....

            To begin with, I’ve never considered myself a runner. I’ve always wanted to be a runner. I’ve always wanted to be the kind of person who wakes up and the first thing I do to start my day is go for a run. Last year, I became that person. It was as simple as finding a running buddy, lacing up and heading out to pound pavement. It’s been nearly a year and I’m still on two days a week with said running buddy. The other five days kind of sucked, though. I felt, to quote Cher Horowitz, “impotent and out of control” on the days when I didn’t get a run in. So, I started going on one other day a week and then, eventually, four days a week. This isn’t to say I was religious about it all year, but I could feel it when I missed a run here and there. Both in my body and in my mind.

            This year, I found this challenge from www.ilovetorun.org to run 1,000 miles in 2016. I thought it would be a perfect way to ensure I maintain my four-day a week running schedule as well as a neat way to challenge myself. The great thing about running is that it’s taught me a lot about life and overcoming. I’ve found a lot of parallels between the two and so I want to share them with my readers as I accomplish my new goal. I will be publishing a column once a month in BLANK newspaper, as well as keeping you filled in here on the blog, newly named “M1les T0 G0.”

            My goal with the blog is to inspire but also to hold myself accountable, not only with the challenge, but also with my writing. I want you guys to keep me accountable as well as share your own challenges and goals. I want this to be interactive. Email and Facebook me and we’ll go on this adventure together. No, you don’t have to run 1,000 miles BUT I’m sure there’s something you’d like to challenge yourself to do. So…. Let’s do it together!

Very appropriately, one of my Accountability Buddies posted on Facebook today a motivational photo with the quote “If not now, then when?” And, I guess that’s my question for you…. Whether, you choose to embark on a challenge of your own or simply follow my progress, I look forward to spending the year with you. On your marks!

Goal for 2016: 1,000 miles

Year to date:    17 miles

Miles to go:     983 miles

FOOTSTEPS

Some friends of mine have been taking time to get together and write. It's something of a nerdy literary game night, but there's vodka and wine so it, at least, seems cool. There's an implied circle of trust there that allows us to express a certain amount of vulnerability when we write and share our pieces. We use word and visual prompts, along with a number of other tools to make the game more interesting and work our brains just a little bit more than your average writing prompt. Last night one of the final prompts of the night was a Timed 2 Minute piece using the word prompt "footsteps".

Since I so often post about my journey as a runner, I thought this might be an appropriate place to share one of my blurbs from our Writing With Friends Wednesday (we're working on the name). And so, without further needless rambling, I present to you: 

Footsteps.

 

The cadence is soft. Or sometimes loud when she's tired. Or lazy. The sun comes up. She gets lost in her stride. Lost in her gait. Lost in thought or the absence of it. The air gets warm. She breaks a sweat. She's lost in being drenched. In feeling strong. As her footsteps pound the pavement.

Well, now that it's written out, it seem so insignificant. I promise, two minutes is not as long as you think! Either way, it's true and it speaks to my heart. It definitely motivated me through four miles this morning. Just me and the sound of my feet!

Back on track: integrity.

I set out for a slow six miles today. The 'long run' of the week on my training schedule. Early on, I saw trouble. I began to negotiate with myself; switch songs, slow down, there's almost a downhill, hold on. It didn't work, I was approaching a point on my trail where left would take me back to my starting point with a four mile finish and a right turn would accomplish my goal of six. As I approached the fork in the road, I evaluated myself: I could finish four strong and feel impressive OR I could run a weak six and accomplish what I set out to do. Integrity is what you do when no one is watching. I turned right. It was slow and I battled with myself and my pain and my breathing but I finished. I did what I set out to do. No shortcuts, no excuses. Six miles in the bag. Doing what you say you will do is the action of a strong person. Weak run or strong, I did what I set out to do. That's the action of a strong person. I can feel good about that.

Heeeere's Jackie.

In honor of Halloween and the two year anniversary of the blog, I am resurrecting my writing career (let's use "career" loosely, here, folks). It may be pointless. It may not be the least bit interesting. It may be simply my own meandering thoughts. But, to be honest, that's all it's ever been so deal with it. Currently, the only thing that occupies my time is running. Also, my new house and my awesome nephew. I'm essentially the most basic almost 30-something you've ever met and this is my blog about it. So if you're not interested in hearing about my running revelations and my precious nugget's squishy cheeks, you might not want to stop by for a while. But! If you like a good turn of phrase and goofy one-liners, welcome, come by anytime!

What do you think about when you’re running? Nothing…. And also everything.

I kicked off a ten-week training program last week. I decided not long ago that I was going to run a full marathon once I got my half marathon time down to under two hours. My previous two times being 2:11 and 2:06, this shouldn’t be a difficult task. My annual half isn’t for another six months, though, and I see no reason to put off achieving my goal. I certainly see no reason to have a six-month training program to shave six minutes off my time. As such, I’m starting now with my projected “Race Day” being Christmas morning.

There are no races on Christmas Day. Anywhere.

Still, though, I’m going to wake up and take myself out on a happy little 13.1 miler after Santa visits and before cinnamon rolls, lasagna, antipasto, and cannolis. Maybe Santa will bring me some new running capris?

In addition to achieving my sub-2 goal, I want to see if I can adhere to a training schedule. Generally, training programs will require intervals or hill workouts. They may emphasize a certain pace for a training run; “slow run,” “tempo run,” “race pace.” One, in particular, that I love (in the not-love, ridiculous way) is Hal Higdon’s “5 x 400 5-K pace.” This means I should run 400 yards, five times at a 5-K pace, yes? I suppose I would determine my 5-K pace by dividing my desired half marathon pace by the miles in a half marathon and then multiplying that by 5K? So, an hour and 59 minutes by 13.1 miles times 3.15? So…. I want to run at a 9.08 mile pace? How exactly do I determine in such a short distance if I’m traveling at a 9 minute pace? I’ve already done far more math than pleases me in a short period of time. So, no, Hal Higdon, I will not be doing your Day 3 400 yard – hold on, wait, does it mean meters? See! I don’t even know. All I want to do is run, man. As such, I tend to ignore the specifications of random programs I find online and focus solely on the miles.

For this new goal, though, I wanted to attempt a more rigid – but not Higdid (see, that’s a blend of rigid and Higdon) approach. I searched the interwebs for a more relaxed training schedule that would still offer a structured approach to improving my time. It was quite strenuous. I typed, “sub 2:00 half marathon training” and the first link was a map from Runners' World with “easy runs,” “race pace,” and “tempo run”, which include a one to two mile warm-up. Nothing fancy. No scary words like “fartlek.” Just distance with a recommended pace.

I can do that.

Last Monday, I set out on a five mile run; three miles of which were to be run at a 9:09 pace. I decided to run the first, third and fifth miles at the 9-minute pace. I had my doubts about my ability to run one mile, let alone three, at a nine mile pace based on my lack of practice from these last few months, but I want to take this training seriously and I want to prove to myself that I am capable of improving my time so I set out with a determined mind. I did great.

I was checking my Garmin watch and evaluating my speed. A ten minute mile is going to be about a minute per tenth of a mile, so a nine should be somewhere just under that. I knew I had it down.

Tuesday, I set out for what the training schedule called an “easy run.” It was simply four miles at a 10:30 pace. Ouch. Don’t get me wrong, I can run a slothenly 11:40 pace on mile 7 after a pretty strenuous hill but, ultimately, I find limiting myself to a 10:30 pace to be a bit difficult. Again, though, I want to take this training seriously. Also, I see value in learning the speed of my strides. Also, the value of slowing myself down – both, physically and in life. Don’t we all just need to learn to slow down, though? I’m addicted to my Garmin watch and I monitor nearly every tenth of a mile – mostly as a distraction for my mind – and I’ve noticed this nervous habit has helped me better guess where I’m at, pace-wise, during a run.

Whether it was pushing for three 9-minute miles in the midst of five or reining myself in on four 10:30-minute miles, I’ve found these last two runs wildly fulfilling. Today, in particular, I set out needing to breath. Needing to think. To suss things out, if you will. To relax. To get out and just be me for (according to the training schedule) 42 minutes.

Today, I programmed my iPod with a couple of my new favorite pop and rock favorites (if you’re not in love with Tove Lo, you’re missing out on Amazing) and chapter two of the Hunger Games book one. I hit the pavement, determined to suss things out and keep myself slow and relaxed. People ask, “What do you think about when you run?” My response: “nothing… and also everything.” Stride after stride, I kept meaning to think about the bills I have to get paid this week and did I make enough last week to cover everything. I kept meaning to think about the last boy that broke my heart and if I wanted to see him when he comes through town. I kept meaning to think about the next boy who’ll break my heart and if I want to let him. I wanted to think about what color to paint the spare bedroom, what treats and gifts I’d send my friend in Afghanistan for his next care package, what would I buy my sister for Christmas – she’s so tricky. I had intended to finish my run with life sorted out.

But then, foot strike after foot strike, I was looking at my Garmin. I was going too fast. I needed to slow down. I was listening to the Hunger Games. Being introduced to Peeta Mellark for the first time. And maybe falling for him a little (don't tell Gale). I was appreciating the scenery and my landmarks. And I was studying my breath. I was done with my run.

I have an olive or hunter green shade picked out for the spare room, though from a Feng Shui standpoint I’m not sure it’s creatively a good choice. The Afghanistan care package will surely pack itself but I should get a move on that. And I’ll probably buy my sister a sweater if these workouts don’t yield a more awesome idea – deal with it, Sister, you’re tricky! I am no closer to solving the mysteries of life, though.

I am, however, more confident that I can dominate this training schedule. I’m certain that I am mentally and physically strong enough to fulfill the requirements of each run: fast, slow or tempo. I know what a 9, 10 and 10:30 pace feels like. I suspect I will be running a full marathon in six months and not just a half. I enjoy my runs.

I got in the car at the end of the workout and started driving home. Suddenly, all my woes started to sort of wave at me from a distance – as though across a body of water. They were flailing their arms, shouting “hey! Hey, we’re still here!!” I realized I hadn’t sorted out, let alone thought, about a single one of my silly problems. It was as though I’d left them at the starting line and put four long and slow miles between them and me. As I made my way home, I realized I didn’t really care about any of those silly problems. They would get sorted out. They would sort themselves out. Or I would sort them out. After all, I’m a mentally and physically strong person. What is there that I can’t do?